The Upside of Trauma: Post-Traumatic Growth
REMEMBER SAMANTHA?
She was the survivor of sexual abuse in her marriage and went on to create a new life for herself with a loving husband and a beautiful career. For a long time, though, Samantha was incredibly angry and bitter about her past abuse and the negative impact on her mood, relationships, and physical health. She was plagued by flashbacks, nightmares, and bouts of rage and couldn’t see a way out. However, as time went on and she was rebuilding her life, she had glimpses of joy and began to wonder if maybe, just maybe, life didn’t have to be this miserable forever. She began to get curious about how her trauma might have some positive impacts and noticed the power of the human spirit. Samantha noticed that sometimes people come away from trauma seemingly stronger than they were before. Her first observation was how much more empathetic she was, particularly when encountering others who experienced trauma.
“If you never heal from what hurt you, you will bleed on people that didn’t cut you.”
~ Author Unknown
THE POWER OF EMPATHY
Samantha spent years hurting so many people out of her own hurt that she started recognizing that same struggle in other people. She noticed that instead of anger toward them, she began to experience empathy. Samantha knew that they were mean and spiteful for a reason and she started to meet them with kindness and compassion. She felt her heart grow and expand as she was able to connect with people who were acting out of their hurt. Samantha developed a warmth and ability to see through the crusty exteriors of those whom others had given up on and forgotten. She refused to give up on them, because she wanted them to see life through a new lens: the lens of post-traumatic growth.
“Post-traumatic growth (PTG) is where someone has been affected by PTSD and finds a way to take new meaning from their experiences in order to live their lives in a different way than prior to the trauma.”
~ Dr. Marianne Trent, a clinical psychologist and owner of Good Thinking Psychological Services
THE POWER OF GRATITUDE
Samantha also experienced a surge of gratitude as she reflected on how much her life had changed for the good. She became incredibly grateful for her husband and his kindness and patience with her as she went through the grueling process of healing from trauma. Samantha also felt intense gratitude when she was the recipient of kindness from friends, colleagues, and even strangers. She felt her heart swell as she learned to accept their kindness and then spread it to others. Samantha noticed that the more gratitude she expressed, the more good things came to her….gratitude begets more good things that warrants more gratitude. How about that math?!
“Acknowledging the good that you already have in your life is the foundation for all abundance.”
~ Eckhart Tolle
THE POWER OF RESILIENCE
Above all, Samantha realized that she was stronger, wiser, and more resilient than she knew. She noticed that she was waking up feeling joyful and was ready to face the day. She noticed that she could handle stressors as they came her way and took them one step at a time. Samantha applied what she learned in counseling and those coping strategies made her stronger and gave her a greater capacity to face the inevitable hardships in life that never stop coming, because well, that’s life. No matter how much we want our lives to resemble that of the curated social media feeds, that’s not realistic. In fact, it’s the tough times that can help us see the beauty in the good times. The language of resiliency leads us to find the good in every day, even if every day isn’t good. Look for the growth in the crack in the sidewalk, rather than focusing on the crack itself. That’s resilience. That’s post-traumatic growth.
ARE YOU READY FOR POST-TRAUMATIC GROWTH?
Begin Adult Trauma Counseling in Columbus, Ohio. You don’t have to suffer any longer.